3rd Banter

The words I say are psychotropic, I was high on life when they were born. Conceived in the mental, mind fucked. Thoughts came. Cranial birth. Untitled, bastard child with no name. Every day more of the same. Unborn. Many born. Torn. Forlorn. I've no clarity, that's clear to me. Smart as a whip. Dumb as a brick. Sick shit.

Infamy never a goal for me. Seems a hectic road to me. Travel well if that you seek. I shy away. A post card, don't even send me. I'm all alone. Been since. Contacts I don't contact. People lack sense common. Combat roaches and rats. Hands out, begging is a disease. When the face hits the floor challenge them to pick it up in one piece. Peace. Walk swiftly. When I make moves I do so quickly. Don't look back it'll cause you to sway forth. Teeter totter martyr.

Online, dial up, I'm waiting on line. Word account on E. I should deposit a line. I develop too much and withdraw quicker. Rite back I go. Practice makes me sicker. To keep from being focused I try to stay focused. Its just. Damn. A changed plan. Altered state. I feel violated. Mind fucked. This is date rape. But I liked it. I'd do it all again. Deja vu.

3rd man green. High self esteem. Held in high esteem. Humane in action to the fellow man. Equal action to his rib. After all, she questioned the orb. Dove right in. Red ripe flesh. Cherished it. Savored it. Condemned them. Time ticks. We made it. Game of chance. She played it.

The future in a second is now. Its always coming. Always passing. My spectacles, dual monocle's. What a spectacle. Receptive is the psyche that's receptive to other psyches.
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Daily Tip

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RichnerD Daily Tip

Lack of trying denotes failure. Trying and failing, denotes learning. Education bequeath triumph.

Luck is no substitute for hard work. Chance should not be left up to chance, because, "chance favors the prepared mind". If you want something, work for it. If you want to excel, work at it. Victories aren't given, but earned. Doing things half assed will most assuredly leave you assed out. Strive hard. Word hard. Succeed. Play hard.

Just my 3rd cents...
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Daily Tip

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RichnerD Daily Tip

This Thanksgiving I want to send out warm wishes for all. Enjoy your day, and bask in the moment with loved ones. Oh, and eat hella food people. Its a free day.

The key to optimizing your thanksgiving dinner intake, is pacing yourself. Eat to fast, your stomach expands rapidly and you get full. Too slow, and welp, boredom and the gases will get you. Sure and steady cleans the plate. Do that, and you'll be house hopping and plate gathering like a pro.

By the way, don't fill up on main courses and miss those fabulous desserts. They're a part of the dinner too. And for petes sake, stay away from the beverages. Use them to wash the food down. Don't gulp too much too early. You'll be out of the running for sure. Eat and be merry.

Just my 3rd cents. Enjoy.
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Today...

Today is a new day. Remnants of the past are woven in the fabric of this day. They're the threads of tomorrows cloth. The fabric of time. Yet still, today is a new day.

I looked in the mirror today. I looked and I saw me. I saw 3rd. The man I am today, and who I aim to be tomorrow. Hindrances aside, my pride won't let my goals subside. Fight I must. Its a winning battle. Today is another day of the war.

I dreamt today. Dreamt of you. Wanted you. Belonged to you. Tomorrow you'll belong to me. I won't own you, but I'll have you. I'll possess you, but I won't possess you. It'll be me and you. Ie, you and I. Just say yes.

Today's current sights on the sites. Live journal. I blog my journal. 3rd sites. #Random thoughts are The Destination For The Undestinated. My BlackBerry Is Black with the Soul Of A Sole. Yesterdays thought is today's posted update, subsequently tomorrows archive.

The kick flow today, well we'll just say I'm an all star. Low top 2 stars. Inked stars double. 3rds ink nine. Will it stop now, nein. Tomorrows galaxy half sleeve. Non-ink, pet peeve.

Today is past the dawn. Nights end, dawn comes. The day over has just begun. Loop infinite. Yet its time is finite. My time's not limitless, but perpetually finite.

Yesterday I knew that today would be new. That tomorrow would soon come, and today would be the past I knew. Barring word play, I'd take any day. Come, go, stay. Just wake up for the day. Rise, grind and live. Live for today.
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Daily Tip

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RichnerD Daily Tip

"Not succeeding, when giving your all, is far from failing".

Success is not only measured by victories you've won and awards you've accumulated. Trying, attempting new things, and learning along the way denotes triumph. Determination and conviction, amongst doubt, amounts to victory. Think not you've lost when another stands at a higher tier. Your journey was your own, and your victory is profound. Seek honor and pride in that.

Just my 3rd cents. Enjoy the day. Own it and make it count.
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Daily Tip

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RichnerD Daily Tip

"Loyalty, in the face of adversity, breeds strength. Solidifies bonds"

Loyalty is a far to easily abandoned trait. The loss of it is not virtuous. Don't burn bridges if you're not done with your travels. These testaments of time are shining examples for others. Once formed, bonds are of altruist nature. Expansion takes many minds. Many legs. Loss denotes consequence. Such consequences should be inconsequential.
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RichnerD Daily Tip

"Perfect. Not in the sense of perfection, but in placement. Bound not by force, but will. Sized up by loves measure".

Love is a fickle creature. One of great ingenuity. In matters of the heart she takes precedence. Love is, so love does. Play your position and never let your position play you. Happily ever after is what you make it. You don't have to accept all. Accept that, and you'll be fine.
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RichnerD Daily Tip

"Life can be a blur at times. It doesn't come equipped with auto focus. The more you try to fine tune it, the further out of focus things tend to get".

No matter what occurs, life happens. There's no avoiding it. The more you try to fix the more that messes up. Sometimes you have to roll with the punches. The best fix, is no fix at all.
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Never Again

Never again will I try
Easier to let hope die
Sigh
Cry a river, build a bridge
I wish I were over it

Never again will I stand
Sitting is much butter
Better still if I ran
As fast as I can
I've no place to go

Never again will I love
Accept a heartfelt hug
Let down my defenses
Let her kiss in
Hear me talking, listen

Never again will I trust
I'll trust not to trust
Variable trust
Relationship for what
I'd rather a tryst. Trust

Never again will things be the same again
I thought wrong
I assumed wrong
We were just cool
What went wrong

Never again will I dive headlong
I've just been headstrong
Forethought
Candor
Friend or foe

Never again will I hope high
High hopes
Just a rope a dope
Mope. Nope
A part of be just died. Hope

Never again will I visit you
Never will I visit you
When I see you it won't be that you
Rather, just you
Never my, well, you

Never again will sense be made
Sense need not be made
Sit back and gather shade
Sun doesn't shine on me
3rd son Green. To me the fates are mean


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Daily Tip

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RichnerD Daily Tip

"Trust is earned, but in its absence the benefit of doubt should be given"

Trust is not easily earned or given. That doesn't mean to say that those without it are guilty. If they've not had sufficient time to earn it, how can they be disciplined. Our society is built on the premise of "guilty until proven innocent". We cannot enforce as a whole what we cannot practice as individuals. Decisions made in haste in the end cause loss of face. You reap what you sow. Plant trust and grow upon faith.
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Daily Tip

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RichnerD Tip

"Don't dine on the quail before you superintend its offspring"

Rash actions produce rash reactions. In Thoroughness of thought you will nigh lament transpired events. Dine hardily on the ambrosia of life,but don't forget the minds share. In acting, take care.
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Tagged

Brand new you. You're acting quite igged. Ms fresh off the assembly line. You're tude has got me igged.

Words brazen. There's nothing different about the show but you. Remixed script. Fine. New honey dip. Fine. I don't need your time, but you will respect mines.

You keep forgetting your place. Face off. Outa pocket. Show off. Your my homie and I love you. In a bind who do you run to. But now you want to act funny style. Bong.
Even as a halloween costume. Wow. You're not #low. We see you. Over here, hey boo. Click. Snap. Flash. Got the pictures, I seen you. Pappa.

What you do is your biz. I'm supportive 86 400. Drop one. Add one. Even. No questions no judging, harassing. I'm there. BBM me I'm here.

The winter is cuffin season. Actions have neither rhyme nor reason. Turn your back on uncle sam and its treason. Well, start thinking of me as your mothers brother. Steven.

You don't have to pop ya collar, just flip it. All that extra, I'm really not with it. Cut it out. Its nathans. Uglier than gold daytons. #wheretheydothatat. SMH. Wavy
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Daily Tip

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RichnerD Daily Tip

"The loss of clarity, more often than not, stems from over thought, lack of action, and an incurious nature".

Tangent thoughts affect us so because there is nary a time when we are steadfast, and earnest in our convictions. Allowing outside forces to sway your tenant beliefs, stifle creative outlook, or beguile your intellect, fractures that which is undoubtedly you. "Children are remarkable for their intelligence and ardor, for their curiosity, their intolerance of shams, the clarity and ruthlessness of their vision". This is gift, a sense of sorts, which we loose in adulthood as our educated minds block out intuition. The simplest definition is often the most accurate. Curiosity never killed the cat, just annoyed him. Just actions, need no explanation, for their reasons are just.

Friday night insight

I was never the alpha male type. Pick up lines, nan. Just the easy talk to type. I'm a libra. Laid back, hardly gripe. That fight or flight skipped us. We talk it out. The gift of gab is us. Trust. There's a notion. No5. Never that potion. Outer beauty nerd made. I expanded my mind when I was locked up in my room. Hella free time boo. Read the encyclopedia, novels, medical dictionary too. I know a lot. True. Even more that I don't. Care to teach me. Step correct if you want to reach me. Preach to me. Ether. Knowledge burns forever. Together. Unpleasant are the days of yore. Days without you. You without me. So you see. It had to change. I had to jump out of my range. On the scene. You've been seen. Flash. That mental pic. Develop you I will. Envelop me you will. Apart but together still. Its driving me crazy. How can I miss what I never had. Forlorn is the ever contemplative mind. Physics. -9.8 m/s 2. That's how fast I fell for you. Redirection didn't work. I spun 360. Back where I started, except this isn't where I began. Vantage point. Back or forth. Altered states. Regardless, you're in my space. Haste. Never that. Slow down. No need to rush the night away. Time is of the essence, yet essence is subject to relevance. I can dig it. So slow down. When it comes to me. Never front. Why fake it. History in the making. What am I longing for. UK son. I want a world tour. Malato d'amore. Nah. I'm on a different plain. Gulf stream 3rd. Make it rain. Drizzle codecs. Never mistake the context. My scribes are my doctrine. Manifest. Confessed. Blessed. Stressed. Lithium.
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All The Ifs...

If heaven could wait, would you stay here with me

If time were of the essence, would you spend yours with me

If I dared to dream, would you be my fantasy

If I accepted life's journey, would you be my guide

If I got down and proposed, would you be my bride

If ever the time came for us, would you accept our fate

If I uttered the phrase "I Love You", would you have any words to say

If I told you I wrote a book, would you want to be showcased in a chapter

If I stated that you were beautiful, would you think me to be caught up in your rapture

If I told that I was tired of waiting, would you say my wait was done

If I said I wanted to make 1 and 1 into 2, could I do that arithmetic with you

If all the ifs were simply questions affixed to our time line, would you pass by gingerly, or stop, stare, read, and take care to answer, with me.

If...

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Daily Tip

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Richnerd Daily Tip

"Excellence is an art won by training and habituation. We do not act rightly because we have virtue or excellence, but rather, we have
those because we have acted rightly. We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act but a habit." - Aristotle

The presence of virtuous acts does not in fact make us virtuous. Deception is an affront to goodness and virtuosity. In time your true colors will shine through for you cannot fool all of the people all of the time. Courage under fire, bravery in the face of fear, conviction of character, humility in ones achievements and endeavors. Many a conscious effort go un -applauded, but not unnoticed. However these are not meant to be praised, for they build us spiritually, emotionally, mentally. Be you, the true you, for anything else is a lie.
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I think she said yes

We've decided to make a trade. Even as can be. It had to be done. Had to free up space. Enough time has passed. I need to rise and take my place. We've exchanged words many times before. This time in particular happens to mean much more. Let's explore. Undeniable attraction. This mutual affliction for one another. I want you to be my ritual. Praise in your presence. Idols never false. This is on another level. My flesh ridden deity. An ode to my queen. Maybe not today but one day. Hence. I prepare. Your intense stare. Penance stare. With every fiber I care. Its not a runaway love though. A thoughtful love, love. An intimate consciousness. Through emotion comes expectation. Expect the best. I'll give all just accept my best. I'll try harder. Call me Avis. Teach me something. Mavis. To pass you up. Gravest. So sweet. I wanna go to your town. Roots. Fore mother. Before mother. Have to see where you came from to know where your headed. Beauty. Your intelligence is sexy. To me. Rage. I hate circumstance. Why can't we circumvent. In your arms I'll do a life stint. Love your gaze. Hint. A month ago, damn, I wish I knew mo betta. I should've let it flow from jump. 21 street. Feelings I hide. No clue why. Tears I shed. Figurative. No longer. I beat to a new drum. With a new circulation of blood. Starting from now. So yesterday. Foundation built on pbx.
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Daily Tip

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Richnerd Daily Tip

"Modern families are neither composed of blood nor water, but rather, an infinite mix of the two".

Gone are the days of kin simply referring to a blood relation. To date, some of my closest family has been comprised of those whom fate has blessed me with, and not those I was born with. Family supports, nurtures, aides, and in those oft-needed times, offers invaluable and blunt criticism. At times they tend to encroach upon our lives causing instantaneous discomfort, yet we accept and welcome these acts because they are family. In person, or long distance, family is always there, even when they are not, for even they're absence speaks volumes. When surrounded by family we are afforded the opportunity to see our past, develop the present, and embrace our future. Through their faces we see us. Know where you come from, and embrace and learn from those generations past, lest history repeat itself. Live love life
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Daily Tip

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Richnerd Daily Tip

"What a tangled web we weave, when first we aim to deceive"...

Playing with ones emotions, is a dangerous game to play. Such things should not exist in healthy relationships, but now and then they find the way in the door. Lies and deceit have no place in life and love. If this is your aim, then please move on, or better yet, don't start to begin with. Do not take comfort in hurting, tricking, lying too, breaking another down, because in the end it is you who will pay for these grave errors. Lies, adultery, secret children, violence, theft, std's. Your union should not read like a wrap sheet. Your partner should not act as the parole board, weighing your 2nd, 3rd, or even 4th chance. To do so is ludicrous not only on your part, but should be unfounded on theirs. Granted, love beats not from logic and reason, but the gravely illogical and unreasonable should cause the inverse reaction. Live learn love. But play no games when doing so. Be forthright. And you will be blessed.
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Daily Tip

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Richnerd Daily Tip

"R-E-S-P-E-C-T, it should mean the same to you as it does to me"...

Respect is one of those things aft taken for granted. Always commanded, but nigh given. When addressing and interacting with people, you should do so in accordance with the level of respect you wish to be reciprocated. In being condescending to others, you should expect entirely and unequivocally to be treated in the same regard. Respect is one of those many powerful yet simplistic things in which everyone speaks about yet simply fails to understand. A word which encompasses acts, thoughts, and emotions. In the event you feel you are not being given your due, simply let professionalism and courtesy lift you higher. Silence speaks volumes, and kindness overwhelms.
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She

Dazed, confusion sets in
Why do people play with your heart, your mind
Why torment the soul
Where do i go from here, I'm lost
Who will find me, how do i find myself
I'm stuck, falling, sinking deeper
My sorrow, my grief, my pain pulls me down
A light shines, I can barely see it who stands before me
Reaching in to save me
Can she help
I reach back, i see her
Come closer, closer, she's in front of me
She's...
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Daily Tip

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Richnerd Daily Tip

"Men are from mars, woman are from venus, and relationships can be a pain in YOURanus"...

It will always be a chore to be able to understand the opposite sex as we have many a different view on a plethora of subject matter. Often men have one understanding, woman have another, and within the union itself occurs a whole another instance. A mish mash of overflowing ideas, thoughts and expectations. The best tool to have in your arsenal is effective interpersonal communication. The ability to talk, listen, interpret and respond is indeed a great thing. And like all things, it takes practice.

Live well, talk long, fight less...
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*

Presume for a moment that you know me
In knowing me, would you assume to know me
Richard, RdotGreen, RichnerD
Who am I, who am I, who am I
My writings not on the wall, its on my blog though
Dare to meet me, attempt to know me
Dare to read me, try to teach me
Never who you want me to be
Always who I'm going to be
Me
When your thoughts flutter do they fly my way
Do you care
In my life I've seen a lot, done a lot
Life is not easy, but hard work
A lot
Always pulling overtime cause the work pays off overtime
I'm going to end where I began
Consciousness within a vessel
Going to the hereafter in knowledge
My vessel
The final destination
Transcend*
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Daily Tip

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Richnerd Daily Tip

"Compromise, if not the spice of life, is its solidity. It is what makes nations great and marriages happy".

When it comes to faith, integrity and human rights (to name a few), we should all strive to be unmoved, and remain steadfast and be forever unyielding. For lesser matters though, compromising may indeed be the name of the game. Marriage, family, and relationships are a prime example of the importance of compromise. The achievement of such a dyadic consciousness (mutually beneficial/give and take relationship) in and of itself denotes compromise. "For everything you have missed, you have gained something else, and for everything you gain, you loose something else". These accepted losses only go to strengthen bonds, for in the end what is gained is truly more valuable.
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Daily Tip

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Richnerd Daily Tip

"Sedit qui timuit ne non succederet"

"He who feared he would not succeed sat still".
Horace...

Failing in ones endeavors only strengthens their resolve and prepares them for triumph on their next attempt. The shame should not be in failing, but in not trying. It is through trial and error that we progress. Should we all cease to try, we would all simply cease to be...

Complacency and ignorance are indeed the venomous fruit.

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Untitled

Captivated is an understatement. These feelings I must fight. Can a deity even see me. If so, would she see me.

My spark. My muse. My spirit she does amuse. Archaic. A cougar, an amazon from the amazon. Damn she's amazing. 68 in december, by way of november. I admit she's quite my senior, damn. Of course of numbers I'm no fan.

My lady is not of this world, but a sub division of it. Themyscira. Her spirit plucked from the cavern of souls. Timeless and forever. Blessed.

When she's jet set she's truly an invisible woman. When she binds me I spit the truth. Lasso. She comprises the ultimate souls, therefore she has the ultimate soles. Collector. Now I re mix the question, can we be together.

Known by many, yet known by few. She sports indestructible jewelry. Spectacles phenomenal. I can talk about her all day. Her praises are far from nominal. Accomplished.

Not sure where I'm going with this, I just had to write. I can't get it off the dome. These thoughts have taken up residence. Found a home. Squatters.

In the UK they lick brains. I need to go on holiday. Born day. In Europe I'll be her american boy. Greece is the hometown. Paradise island, home bound.
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Daily Tip

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Richnerd Daily Tip

"Trust is not only earned, its a scientific principle"...

Trust is a gift, given to the deserving. The ability to trust is a virtue that is not instilled upon us, but rather, it is an ever changing characteristic reacting to the human condition. Our ability to trust depends on the possibility of trusting another. If we can't, then we won't. To be sly, deceitful, sneaky, etc; does not denote the behavior of a trustworthy individual. Live righteously, and you will righteously live.
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BK My Home

The major borough of Brooklyn is my home. Every now and then my section has to roam. Bed Stuy, Crown Heights, Bay Ridge, Canarsie. All independently Brooklyn, and cohesively a part of me. The Heights has my heart, the place where I got my start. Then I ventured out, conquered, gained my footing. East NY, Dumbo, Flatbush, Brooklyn Heights. I'm all over, roaming with T-Mobile. On that Blackberry Tour. Wherever I go I'm walking on air. Step lightly, NIKE. Green Lines, Blue Lines, Red Lines, Orange. The diamond is my friend, but I bump the circle daily. Vente in the summer. Vente in the winter. I'm bucks all around. Vente on the vente. On every corner sits the liq, Ock next door pushing that Hallal. Kosher. Beef, its what's for dinner. Grand Army got that brain food. Wisdom house. Botanic got the plush green. The Burg is where the artist dream. The Slope is full of peace. Serene. Chill in the Park to catch the gleam, Sunset. Brooklyn is my home, with T-Mobile I roam. On that Blackberry Tour. AM on the feet. Praise the goddess, Just Do It...
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Daily Tip

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RichnerD Daily Tip

"Sometimes Life Is Like Blue Roses"

Everything can't be good all the time, that would defeat the purpose of balance. Sometimes when they go bad, they're really bad. Here and there though there are moments of immeasurable beauty and clarity. Unsurpassed pleasure, and happiness. The flickering seconds that make the rest of time worth experiencing. I call these moments "Blue Roses". Never give up, don't dawdle, for you never know what miracles may be found in your life's garden. You don't need a green thumb, you just need to live.
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Thoughts Stirring (I Can’t…)

My mood is sober. My melancholy mind aches for a ubiquitous spark. Through my indifference, my eyes see truth. My emotions are stagnant. My brilliance capped. Your candor is wanted, though I shall not request it. My mind wants you at my hearts behest. My soul flutters, my soles stutter. Agony not in defeat, but at thoughts indicative of a forlorn never after. Truth, therein lies the query. Do you even see me. The answer to thoughts prior I dare not contemplate. In this moment I shall not exasperate. Complacency is the stepbrother of ignorance, and the father of idiocy. You’ll die should you take it all to literally. ‎​I cherish honesty, and I tend to take mines blunt, with a side of frankness.

Me Express

Absence, MIA is a habit. Through the looking glass I see my reflection. I reflect on me. I focus on you. My thoughts are out of focus. I cannot expose the ocular downloads. One sense down. The others pick up the slack. Common. You drive me sane. Balance is key. I’m a Libran. Equilibrium is me. My sign. My objective forthwith is to forever be me. 3rd is my birthright. His one and only gift. Self taught. Nerd made. I’m out the hood cause its hot everywhere. Believe it, even in the shade. Ahead of the curve, I made the grade. In the SB’s the legume should stay. Hey, I’m just saying. The scribe of a scribe. The thoughts are continuous. Continue thus. Continue us. You are, I am, and we are. Star, shine on me. Rage, glee, happy, sad, me. Wow. Take a bow then stand up. Curtsy, now woman up. Shows over.

Daily Tip

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RichnerD Daily Tip

"A little humility goes a long way".

Humbling ones self, by even the smallest margin, builds character and denotes substance. In this perfect world of ours, it is imperfection that is key. It is the "not knowing" that causes us to grow. Holding your head up high does not mean looking down your nose at another. So eat a slice of humble pie every now and then, its brain food. Swallow your pride, its non fattening.
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Daily Tip

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RichnerD Daily Tip

"kiss it before you can kick it"

Sometimes in life we meet people that can make things unbearable. We also have individuals in which we just cannot seem to get along with, but are in no situation to confront. Sometimes you have to bite the bullet and eat crow until you can change things. Don't bite the hand that feeds you until your able to pick up your own spoon. Don't argue with the boss who signs your paychecks unless you have a new job. And don't get into altercations with the person holding your lease unless you have someplace to go. None of these will end well
Otherwise.
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Daily Tip

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RichnerD Daily Tip

"True love is limitless, bounded by nothing but ones own limitations".

A singular moment of true love shared with ones mate, is infinitely worth more than a lifetime without it. Love is expansive and endless, and must be addressed accordingly. To say it is to know of it, but to do it, to live it, to express it, is to honor it. Honor thy heart, cherish thy love.
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Richnerd Tip

"When venturing into the fair unknown, you must leave as you enter, the traveler unknown".

Do not seek to interject and impose your views where you most assuredly are not an authority. Sometimes the passerby should do just that, pass by. Silence in certain instances is key. Hesitate to trouble still waters for every ripple thereafter shall continue to alter states. Haste in action, brings haste in reaction.

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Daily Tip

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RichnerD Daily Tip

"Value the strength of a woman, never prejudge and downplay her strengths".

Because a woman is strong, assertive, independent, decisive, and intelligent among other things, does not mean that she is angry or bossy. Stop judging woman because your scared of their strengths. Instead, embrace them, learn from them, and follow suit.

Ladies, stop hating on your sistahs.
Fellas, stop getting mad cause you gets no play. Step ya game up.
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Who Am I, Know Thy Self...

The Four Selves...

Open self - The part of us that is known by us and others as well.

Blind self - The part us that is only known to others.

Hidden self - The part of us that is only known by ourselves and has yet to be revealed to others.

Unknown self - The knowledge of self privy to no one, including ourselves.

There are many sides to all of us, Four selves to every psyche. The person we know, the person others know, the person we all know, and the person no one has any idea about.

The presence of these four selves is what makes reading and understanding individuals, us included, so difficult. You cannot accurately judge someone based on what you see, because there is no way to gauge what it is that you don't see. Many people keep their faces separate and adapt as such, separate beings. Who you are at work, is not who you are at play. Who you are with family, is not who you are with friends.

Everyone has a different perception of you based on their views and understandings of the interactions between the two of you. This stems from their intial meeting of you, your dyadic primacy. Thusly for most, a coalition can never me met, nor a dyadic consciousness established.

In getting to know others, we also learn about ourselves. Relationships develop as a reflection of our wants, feelings and thoughts. Because the blind self is knowledge of us which is only privy to others, it is through our friendships and relationships that we further learn of ourselves.

In knowing this, I'm curious above all else of "self". The self I know, the self you know, and the self I want to know. I want to pose the following to all of you. Who are you? When you look in the mirror what/who do you see? Do you see what I see? When you look at me what/who do you see? Do you see me? Do you see what I see?

Lately when I look at me, several reflections rise in my mirror. Richard is always there, but so is Richnerd, RichmaN, and Rdotgreen. All of which are me, as I am infinitely them. My thoughts lead me to a bigger question though. Which is the real me? Are these smaller parts simply sub divisions of who I am? Combined, do they total/complete me, Richard? The more I evaluate, the more I am forced to reevaluate.

I am proud of my accomplishments and the overall man that I am. I am also optimistic of the outcome and success of my endeavors. Form time to time I experience doubt and mixed feelings, but such is life I suppose.

Before I babble on I'm going to end this here. Read, evaluate, reflect, and read again. Life is what you make it, never let it make you.

I'm outie...
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Daily Tip

Good day all

Richnerd Daily Tip

"You can never change who you are, but you can always change what you are".

Who you are is a constant: a man, a woman, a father, brother. Its finite.

However, what you are: intelligent, courteous, volatile or diligent, can always be altered.

Improve upon self and watch the changes echo in others. Being complacent is not a righteous characteristic, but improving upon self is. Live Learn Love.
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New Stock In The Grocery Store

Gone are the days of mama, and nana shopping for me. Being and adult means grabbing your own groceries lol. Well I've never complained because I'd much rather be in command of my shopping and spending anyway. However, on a recent trip I had a hell of a sighting, new stock on the shelves.

During my shopping I was taken aback while perusing the aisles. I Looked up briefly to check the sales prices and BAM, mouse traps. Its not like they were hidden either. They were in plain and open sight, and I found it deplorable. I hurriedly looked around to see if. There were any more and lo and behold they were everywhere. A few of them even had insects stuck to them.

Now, I have no delusions of extra ordinary cleanliness in the streets and shops on Brooklyn NY. However, there should be a standard set. The fact that they set and took all these precautions leads me to believe one thing, infestation. Lmao, I was literally stuck for a moment, then proceeded to put my things back.

I tried telling a few employees what I'd seen but alas, no one cared. I swiftly high tailed it out of there and never looked back. The images are still emblazoned in my head, and of course the memory card in my trusty 'ol blackberry.

Had to share with you guys, get my post out.

Have a blessed day. Come back soon. And don't forget, check out the other blogs.

Rdotgreen.blogspot.com
Rdotgreen.wordpress.com
Soulofasole.wordpress.com

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Daily Tip

Good day all

RichnerD daily tip...

"All work and no play will ruin even the brightest day".

You worked hard, and pushed harder, now its time to reap what you've sewn. Relax, take a load off, treat yourself. Time off rejuvenates the mind and invigorates the spirit. This is what you've been grinding for. Pamper yourself, why not, you deserve it.
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Daily Tip

Good day all.

Richnerd Tip.

"Patience is a virtue".

All good things come in time, because things take time to develop. If gratification was instantaneous, it would also be momentary and fleeting. In the long run time invested, is definitely well spent.
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Daily Tip

Good day all...

RichnerD Daily Tip

"Perspiration denotes effort"

Elbow grease is the cornerstone of success. Everybody roll them sleeves up. If your not sweating and stressed by now, then your just not doing it right. Come hard or go home folks because there's no room for half a$$ing when your chasing a dream.
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Daily Tip

Good day all.

Richnerd Tip...

"Let Your Determination Fuel Your Success"

In any endeavor, determination is key. Good things will not come if you don't strive for them. Get it in your head what you want to do, stay determined, and follow through. Failure is only an option when you don't try.
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Daily Tip

Good morning all…

RichnerD tip:

“Knowledge is learned & wisdom is gained”

Knowledge is learned and studied. Irrefutable facts, or whimsical conundrums. However, no amount of studying can replace common place teachings and life learned lessons. Wisdom gained far exceeds knowledge amassed.

Thoughts On A Train...

As I sit on this 3 express on its 149th journey, I listen to journey. Midnight train coincidentally, and as my thoughts swirl ,my psyche excites me and I begin to write. No forethought or clear thought for that matter. But headlong is how I tend to flow, riding the wave until it has passed, drifted without me.

To chronicle my gains, I'd have to catalog my losses. For me to determine my future, I'd have to analyze my present, and re-evaluate my past. In order to do better, I have to realize the worst. And in order to be a man, ill have to first be a boy.

Growth is not only perceptual, but conceptual. Comprising not only what we see and do, but what we understand and reflect. Change is dependent, transformation is eminent. Dependent upon our circumstance, yet eminent and forthcoming nonetheless. As such, our lives are in themselves an oxymoron'. Live to die, die to live. Succeeding righteously by failing profusely. Praising the ill gotten. Fighting a non violent war. Beautiful mutilation. We run from what we don't understand, yet we cannot understand what we run from.

We are in effect, the beginning to our own end. The Grim Reaper captivates our hidden selves. Beelzebub is within us. And the end is forever nigh.

Should it all end today, would you be content with the life lived. I say no, nyet, never. Complacency, even in the eye of death and weighed against mortality, is still complacency. I want to love, ad experience adventure the whole life through. To die as you live is a death befitting an angel, and shall always be remembered an awarded.

Things seem tough and times are hard. But hard builds character, tough bequeath' diligence. Success should not drive, but encourage you. Happiness, fortitude and conviction of character should be the passengers whom co-pilot your journey. To give up, allowing outside forces to dissuade you, forever being a deterrence, denotes lack of will and easy temptation. Ones goals should ride second to none. When life is the question, indifference is the answer.

I have successfully passed the time on my 'ride', and have reached my destination. I could continue this, but outside of this tunnel my thoughts will not be those induced in and of a train.

Till morrow, may your minds explore, your hearts reach out, and your bodies experience, that which enlightens exponentially.

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Dailey Tip

Good day all. Richnerd Tip:

"Imperfection is perfection"...

In the quest of perfection we look over who we are and what we have attained. It is our flaws and differences that stand out making us who we are. Perfection is a state of mind, and imperfection in mines, is perfection in another's. Be perfect by being you.
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Daily Tip

Good day all.

RichnnerD Tip...

"We shouldn't fear failure, we should fear success at the wrong thing".

Excelling at ill fated endeavors only serves to lower ones self worth, and regress the many changes set forth by our continuous struggles and "movement". We should abstain from such activities, for principle and honor above all are key.
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On the road again...

My driving thoughts...

"If success is its own reward then perseverance is the only option. When the world knocks you down you get back up. Now I'm not telling you to take a hit, a slap in the face, Just pick your battles. The pen has always been mightier than the sword. And a letter, a few chosen words from a man with a bachelors trumps a punk with a fist any day".

After seeing and honing in on life's ins and out, its daily occurrences, I have finally pushed myself back into school to complete my degree. I have a few weeks left in my summer semester and I must say it has totally been worth it. It is never to old to learn new things and expand the mind. Knowledge is empowering, and right now, I feel like an empowered young african american male who is going to continue on my quest, my self fulfilled prophecy. The world is indeed our oyster people, what we consume (mentally, emotionally, physically) and what we put out, determines our pearls (lifes) clarity and grade. Never be deterred, never back down. Find something that is worth dying for, and live for that. Move forward, if only to say, yes I've made it. But never go quietly into the night. Even the most harsh and monstrous of waves eventually recede from the sands, and there is always, always an opportunity to rebuild.

Good day, and god bless...
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You can always go home again...

I've been on an impromptu hiatus from blogger for a while. No special reason, lol, all the reasons contributed. But I'm here now, and writing I'll be doing. They say home is where the heart is, and if I feel comfy with a pen and pad (or mouse and keyboard) then I guess this is where I need to be.

Writing is a release. Haven't done so in so long, it feels like I'm emotionally and mentally clogged. Gonna get the Blogspot Plumber to drain a few thoughts...

Lata blogger, will be writing soon...
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The verdict is in

Yesterday my family and I had a big day. A sad, but good day.

6 years ago my cousin, Kacee Unique Lindsay, was gunned down in the streets for doing what would ultimately be considered an unthinkable act back then and now, walking away from a fight. That's right, he squashed it, and when leaving in the spirit of peace he was shot in the back. April 15, 2003 is a day forever emblazoned in our memories.

Yesterday, April 8, 2009, almost six years to the day, the confessed assailant was finally going to get his due. This human being who showed no remorse for his actions. Expressed any sorrow, nor reached out sympathetically, em pathetically, to the mother of his victim. The family of the victim. Or even the courts who will now dictate the terms of his life. No, he offered no penance, and for that, he deserves no leniency.

This so called man, in the final hour even had the audacity to request a postponement of sentencing in order for his gf and himself to be married before he was sent away. How dare he. No, no such request will be granted, and no favors extended. Immediately upon request, he was denied. 1 point for the penal system.

And so, as the judge read his sentence sealing his fate we had a collective cry. A happy cry. A cry of solace. Though the sentence is not what we expected, we choose to rejoice in this bittersweet victory in order to move on and give this so called man, individual, animal and thug not one more ounce of acknowledgment and thought.

Before announcing her verdict, the judge gave both parties the option to speak. The convicted chose to wave his option, but my aunt spoke on behalf of the family, and her son. I'm pasting her words below in hopes that you'll be able to understand even a minuet amount of the pain, sorrow, anger, we have felt the past long years.

"April 8, 2009

Your Honor, Ladies and Gentleman of the court,
We the family would first like to thank God for carrying us and allowing us to remain sane healthy and prosperous during such a tragic and extremely devastating time in our live.

6 years ago our family was hit with tragedy. A tragedy that we still struggle to overcome, one which has left so many lives empty and forever inconsolable. On April 15, 2003 on the streets of Brooklyn, N.Y. where he was born and raised our SON, FATHER, BROTHER, UNCLE, NEPHEW and Friend, Kacee Lindsay was shot and killed. He was gunned down from behind; like an animal, by an animal. A barbaric animal who had no right to take the life of another human being but also he had no right to even be in this country. We struggle and work to make an honest living to provide for our families, just as Kacee did. Day to day our family struggles, asking God to help us understand and allow us to be able to help us and especially me- his mother and Kacee's son, Kacee Jr. understand how such a dreadful person is allowed to exist in society period. How inhuman and cowardly does one have to be to take the life of an individual and show no remorse? The defendant has sat in this courtroom amongst numerous family members of Kacee, court date after court date, not once did we see a glimpse of remorse from him or his family. Perhaps these are the morals and values they were taught to aspire to become a defendant, a murderer, another poor excuse of a human being, unworthy to walk around free. This poor example of a living creature will have to endure that daily routine of physical imprisonment while Kacee's family and friends will have to endure the mental imprisonment. Because you lack the humanity, ability to value life and back bone to make a positive change you will never be able to imagine the damage and darkness you have brought upon this family. Due to your disgusting and inexcusable choice of your action the lives of many have been forever changed, a mother will never get to hold her son again, a son will never get to hold his father, Kacee will never get to see his nieces and nephews graduate elementary school let alone college. Kacee will never get to come to family gatherings, celebrations, holidays, proud moments, good news and good cheer. You will soon get to understand that for every action there are consequences, the consequences and punishment of this confessed killer is set to receive will never amount to the punishment and consequences we are now facing because Kacee crossed paths with such a reprehensible individual. Not only have you left death and destruction in your path because you lack the ability to think about what you do, you have left that ability to the government, the justice system and God. Because you had no self respect or respect for others your family will suffer too but I feel you really don't care, because you have demonstrated you have no capacity to care, no remorse, no compassion, no love, no decency and unfortunately for you- you will get what you give in this life. However, after today you will be a ghost because you have received enough attention for your horrible actions.

Please know that I want you to be confident that me and my family will move from this dark place because you see, as you carelessly took Kacee's physical body you did not take his spirit because it lives on in Kacee Jr. and all of his close friends and family. You did not take our memories, our laughs, our tears, our excitement, our pain, our will to persevere, our faith in each other, our humanity, our compassion and our promise to Kacee Jr. that we will always honor his father's memory day by day each in our own way. We have so much to live for and all that you have taken for granted and will no longer have access to we will enjoy because we value living and we understand that each day is a gift that's why they call it the present…

We will enjoy the intimate moments with our loved ones, consoling children, hugging and receiving hugs, playing in the park, fresh air, family celebrations, attending weddings graduations, freshly prepared meals, experiencing new things and the latest trends, soaking baths, connections, physical contact, unguarded movement, seasons, sunlight, rain, showers, rainbow snow, autumn air, entertainment, new learning experiences, shopping, surprises, the ability to say hello to new friends and goodbye to those we love and care about. We will continue to live and prosper and give thanks to God for all of the love and light that surrounds us."

Thank you for giving me this time to vent. Trying to be there for me family, I've had to internalize a lot of my feelings and grief. As such my pen, pad, and blackberry note pad have been my only outlet.

Good day, and god bless.

Grande Latte

OK, so I realize that it has been awhile since I have made a blog post so here I am. I sent in 2 poems I wrote that were saved in my cell before I started on this. So I guess its a 3 Pete. I guess this will be a regular post. To catch the world up.

I just got out of a meeting. Was at a convention. An expo at the Hilton for the actors, directors and producers of America. Lol, all in all it was pretty nice. I went with a client of mines, and a prospective new client.

Fast forward to now, expo over. I'm now sitting in Starbucks with my friend Lee, enjoying a white mocha latte with a triple espresso shot. Its pretty good.

Zoning out from our convo, I'm on my berry typing away at the keyboard and wild thoughts are racing through my already worked cranium. The stresses of everyday life are taking they're toll on me mentally and physically. I need a vacation. A sauna. A massage. I just need a getaway. Pronto. Asap.

I think I need a new job. Work is work. But wouldn't it be amazing to love what you do. That's a dream come true. Truly. I'm not asking for the dream position right now, just less stress than I have. What's a man to do.

Things are changing all the time. I wouldn't say that its necessarily for the worse, but its not for the better either. All these lateral moves. Parallel moves. Ugh I need to be vertical. Moving on up. Spiritually, mentally, physically and emotionally. I just need to evaluate me.

But barring the b.s., today was a good day. I won't complain.

OK, he's paying attention to me now. Guess I should zone back in.

Blog you later...

MY Life I Grew Me Up

Half man half amazin, But Under the sun he's just a raisin. Brought up in the streets, his actions brazen. Emotions in his heart and soul ragin. Whose gonna help this boy whose now a man. Never had a chance never had a plan. Didn't ever have a hand. Somebody to teach him to stand. Smile worn, spirit torn. Struggles the name of the game. Breakin even, nah not for steven. They say a mind is a terrible thing to waste, but so is a man. People walk by look and say damn. Shake a head, flash a smirk. Help a nigga, nah, that's to much work. The world is to busy to stop and ask why I cry. Why I try. Why im here. Please, tell me, why are you there. I got my back but who got my front. Uncle sam say he got you but that's just a front. Ima cross coulors like criss. Gotta leak take a piss. But move fast don't wanna miss this. Im bout to shake my fists. Im gonna shout back. Fight the man. I don't need help now cause I've grown to be a man. Took a while but I got a plan. Got a job to help me stand. Got a crib to lay my head. Grub in the fridge to keep my stomach fed. Books on the shelves to keep my brain fed. Wild thoughts in the head. Starting to think ima make it. Wait a minute I made it. Give myself an A+ if you wanna grade it. My life story you just played it. The outro. Ima fade it...

one woman man

when we're apart thoughts of her haunt me. i know it sounds crazy but its like she's a part of me. in the streets or under covers my baby's my equal, there is no other. we were made for each other. like a poet and his pen. an egg and a hen. tied to each other for ever. break up, what. apart, quote the raven, never more. wasn't sent from heaven, my angel came from brooklyn. her block look like crooklyn. she was the diamond in the ruff. not really rough just her exterior was tough. didn't wanna let me in but i scaled the wall, wanna know what im about, the writings on the wall. like peanut butter and jelly, mac and cheese, we complement each other. so whenever we get the chance we compliment each other. she's my day im her night together we make the sun rise. not just my world, she comprises my galaxy. you just don't understand, she means that much to me. i love my girl, i need my girl. we're apart right now, damn i miss my girl. she needs my love so ima give it to her. she gave me strength and peace of mind so ima give it to her. its almost our time to shine so we stay on our grind. food for thought, life's short. why just try to bust it baby. the best part of me since she became a part of me. since we been together i hate when she's a part from me. she may not be the air i breath but when we are apart i cant breath. my lungs run on love now, l O ve2 now...

You

If I said I didn't miss you I'd be lying
The time we spend together
Remarkable
The smiles
Unstoppable
We click so well
So alike
And yet
Opposites that attracted
You bring me joy
You can make the sun smile
Mmm
Serendipity
Where have you been

NO COMMENT

MY HEART RACES AND SCREAMS

WHY ME

IS THIS HOW LIFE SHOULD BE

IS THE FAULT MY OWN

SOMETHING I MYSELF HAVE TO OWN

WHATS DONE IS DONE

I WONT SHED A TEAR

I MUST SAY UP UNTIL NOW

ITS DEFINATELY NOT MY YEAR

BLIMEY

LIFE IS A DARK ALLEY

YOU NEVER KNOW WHATS AHEAD

DAMN

I CANT WAIT FOR ALL THIS TO COME TO A HEAD

ITS OVER

UP AND AND DOWN

LEFT TO RIGHT

I CANT BELIEVE THE VERDICT

STATISTIC IS IS THE NAME OF MY PLIGHT

PREPARE TO FIGHT

SUN TZU

I WANT TO BREAK APART

THE ROCK AT MY CORE,

THE WEB OF LOVE AND SUPPORT

INSTILLED INTO ME INFUSED INTO ME

KEEPS ME TOGETHER

TODAY I WILL NOT MOVE

IN THE END I'LL NOT LOOSE BUT GAIN

THOSE WORDS RING THOUGH

THOSE WORDS READ THOUGH

NO LONGER THE BIRD SINGS THOUGH

SILENCE

I MUST BE WHAT YOU SAY I AM

IF I'M NOT

WHY WOULD YOU SAY I AM

I AM WHAT I AM

AM I

SIGH

CANT GET IT OUT OF MY SYSTEM

I DON'T UNDERSTAND

HAD A PLAN NOT THIS

HAD A DREAM NOT THIS

HERE'S A THOUGHT I'M PISSED

AT WORK

FUCK THIS

SPACED OUT ZONED OUT

OPEN THE WINDOW LET ME OUT

FRESH AIR

I CANT BREATHE

I SEE LIGHT

IM NOT GOING DOWN

RG3

KING WITH NO CROWN

Random Totem

Ever since I learnt how to speak I been spoke.

When I learnt how to read I was awoke. Food for thought.

I'm always fresh, but when I'm not I'm still fresh to life.

I've learned to cook but I'm no chef. That doesn't mean I don't do my best.

When I hope, I leap because I know all things done in faith I'll reap.

My soul glows remarkable. On a quest; driven, unstoppable.

I have the propensity to learn. The capacity to discern. And the drive to earn. Life.

Reluctantly dependant upon a journey of independance. Strive.

Not rough, but built tough. My lifes made me.

Issues of morality sadden me. I'm pro choice, but hate the choice. In cases of advocacy I'll be a voice.

I just kissed a girl and I liked it. But then again, she is my girl, she is my world.

Writing is my release, so I release when I write. Out of mind and in plain sight.

Just pulled up in front of work. Blogging from my cell you already know. Gotta open these gates and start the day. Thanks for reading.

More to come. To be continued.
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Who Am I...

Me, I'm fine, don't know why but I am. Of anger and frustration, I've never been a fan. Angers no friend of mine.



All that I am, I am. Everything I'm not, well that's just a token of the same, just an opposite hand.



Growing up I never really had a plan, no course of discovery. Now as I wander I wouldn't say I'm aimless, I simply remain open to deviations in my uncharted course.

Relationships are rough, because obstacles make them tough. I'm grateful for all I've endured, gowing up it caused me to do, which I can say for very few.



Here I stand, the man that I am. My life was tough but I grew me up. There's still a lot to learn but for knowledge I yearn.



From 'captain save em', to 'captain no more'. I've done all there was, now just can't take anymore.



Art, sculpture or painting. Drawing, stippling or caligraphy. I do it all, why, because I can do it all. I learnt it all because they taught it all. Knowledge is power.



In the city I have a ball. You know what I wanna do, go to an old fashioned ball. Waltz anyone.



New york is my home. Big apple, city under the sun, blanketed by snow runnin from the sun.



Gods son, or a sun of god. I'm not sure of the terminology, but would like to think it describes me. If, I am really in his image, he's all knowing whilst utterly unsure at the same time.



RG3, the name my parents gave. The name I've grown to love, it describes me. It is me.

I TRY...

Hey,

I thought I'd share this with you all. Its one of my fav songs by Talib Kweli called ''I try''. Somehow it always seems to lift me up and help me realise that 'its all just not that bad'. Life is what you make it, and you'll make it as long as you try. Anyway heres the vid and ill paste the lyrics under it.

Talib Kweli - New Music - More Music Videos

New Talib Kweli
Yeah, you know what it is
Come on, come on, yeah
Hey yo *repeats*

[Hook: Mary J. Blige]
I try, I try (that's all we can do)
I try, you know I try
I try, I try (yeah)
I try, you know I try

[Verse 1: Talib Kweli]
K. West! Kweli!Got searched on the plane, Arabic first name
Disturbed by the fame just like Kurt Cobain
Breath of life, kiss of death, my lips pursed the same
You flirt 'til she came
Nothin' hurt like the pain and torture
Daughters of the dust lookin' for a vein
Something to take in vain like the Lord's name
Put your hands together, got 'em all sayin'

[Hook: Mary J. Blige]
I try, I try
I try, you know I try
I try, I try
I try, you know I try

[Verse 2: Talib Kweli]
Yo, it's all ghetto in gear higher, the floor settle
More metal for beef that we don't let the law settle
I try to navigate the treacherous waters of
America's ghettos that set up the slaughteres
But there's more of us
Although we speak in different languages
We all pretty familiar with what anger is
Young and dangerous, ??Get up on some gangsta shit
Guns to bang ya wit'And we put it on records to entertain ya wit'
I'm grown with pains way deeper than Mike Seavers
Our uniforms is white sneakers and white T-shirts
On top of wife beaters
We like to light reefers
The 'hood need us for rappers, just ain't the right leaders
I put a lot into it
This is my product and I gotta move it
Stop the industry but you can't stop the music

[Interlude: Mary J. Blige]
An upside down kingdom where life is just not fair (upside down kingdom)Some many sufferin' cuz deep inside they're scared (so scared)
Fear pumped into their veins to keep them from their destiny
Where would they be if you and I don't care?

[Hook: Mary J. Blige]
I try, I try, you know I try
I try, I try, I try, you know I try

[Verse 3: Talib Kweli]
Yo, the things I'm seein' on the news is insane
A stock broker shoot his kid and throw himself in front of a train
A mother leave her baby home for two weeks all by himself
Three years old, eatin' ketchup and mustard, cryin for help
Tryin' to bring your struggle to life
The label want a song about a bubbly life
I have trouble tryin' to write some shit
To BANG in the club through the night
When people suffer tonight
Lord knows I try

[Hook: Mary J. Blige]
I try, I try, I try, you know I try
I try, I try, I try, you know I try

[Interlude: Talib Kweli]
Life is a beautiful struggle
People search through the rubble for a suitable hustle
Some people usin' the noodle, some people usin' the muscle
Some people put it all together, make it fit like a puzzle
Come on, say it now
Life is a beautiful struggle
People search through the rubble for a suitable hustle
Some people usin' the noodle, some people usin' the muscle
Some people put it all together, yeah

[Outro: Mary J. Blige]
I try, I try, you know I try
I try, oh Lord I try
Everyday I

[Mary J. Bliges harmonizes with the beat]

Upside down kingdom
Oh, they're so scared
Everyday on the news we can't look around without
something somewhere
I try, I try, you know I try
I try, I try, I try, you know I try
Lord knows, Lord knows we try
Yeah

Nice guys finish last, that's why I don't race...

Its been awhile since I've last blogged, I've been busy the past few weeks, but today I just had to let go of a few thoughts.

My weekend was pretty ok, but once tuesday hit, I realized it was a new day. Id describe what my heart is feeling, and what my soul is experiencing, but my brain can't find the words to say.

You ever get to the point when you just can't hear "I'm Sorry" anymore. When you abhor evry word that comes out of a persons mouth. To where you've been through so many rediculous ups and downs, and you realize your tired of theme parks and roller coasters.

I'm so tired of bs and stress. Upset behind anothers actions. I may not be that old physically, but mentally and emotionally I'm way beyond my years. All the cares, all the tears, its taking a toll. My 25 is feeling like a weary 46, and everyday I find myself asking the same question, "Why"...

I'm bleeding love, and right now I'd give anything to switch places with the Tin Man. Kanye had the right idea when he went heartless, and if I had my way it would be the coldest year ever. 

Its wrong to let people influence or change who you are, this I know, but maybe its time for the old me to go. Or maybe its time to let go of everyone I know. Burn old bridges, and prepare my foundation for the structures of tomorrow.

For the longest I've been filled with sorry. I have the tendency to put others first, always letting the needs of those "in need" come before my own. Forever helping and assisting, but who has my back, comes to my aid. If I were a shade id have forseen the coming of the dawn and took appropriate measures to protect myself from and avoid problems.

Do you know how to save a life, cause I could sure use a hand. No, I'm not gonna do anything stupid like take my life, it still needs saving none the less. I'm down to my last breathe, the air is so thick around me, surrounding me. It feels like a hurricane and all the pain is the rain. This is chinese water torture, all these drops on my face, in my place. I try to ride towards the sun, but this weather blows all my attempts away.

I feel like I need to cry but I hold it in. I won't let you hurt me, you already have, so I won't let you see that you hurt me. I know who I am, what I deserve. My ego isn't gonna let me settle. Its too big, and this bs isn't bigger than my will. Ill survive, strive, and continue to thrive. If you know me that shouldn't be a surprise.

Tomorrow I'll be ok, but for today I'll say: lifes a bitch, so be careful what you do. If you loose a good man, that man will be forever lost to you.

Thanks for listening, or reading. I just needed to vent.

You Know What

If you ever need a shoulder to cry on, a strong arm, or warm body to lean on I'm there.

If you ever feel scared, your soul shakes and you tremble, look up to GOD, and when your head comes back down, on your side I'll be there.

Who held your hair back when you were sick, it was me. Who cooked when you were hungry, twas I, (sigh). That guy brushing your hair in the night, gazing at your smile 'cause something in your dream was going right.

Always had your back, and you had my front. This is the blog of me, so I won't front. I wouldn't say I'm the perfect man, but at times the Uber gentleman. Not only now, but from way back when.

God counts the tears of woman, but I wonder if he sorts them out. I'd hate to make you cry a sad cry. From the roofs I would have to shout. I'd holler at myself, talk about regret. Don't fret.

As I ride this train and contemplate, I reflect. Our first date, Kellog's, 'Theeeiiiirrrr Greeeaaat', do you recollect. Do you remember, I think it was a breezy day in September, right before those cold days of December. Fall love.

Always down for you, friends for 9, so I've always rocked with you. Boxed with you, wept with you, dinner at the chicken spot. Long walks, just to be next to you.

As I wander, I wonder, could it be, should it be would it be if... I let it be. Hmm then I think 'Rich', just let it be. Like a bird, faith is free. A penny for your thoughts, but a kind word, hope, wisdom, now that's on me.

I could keep going forever, I always have a ramble. Alas its time, from my hand this phone I have to sever. One post real soon though, we'll be back together.

Goodnight all and remember: in your quest for knowldge, dont loose sight of your quest. In your efforts to be great, you always have to put out great effort.

The Answer Is Simple...

Why do I blog, because no one is around when I need a hug.
Why do I cry, because the emotion gets backed up when I sigh.
Why should I go on, because I'm too strong not to carry on.
Why must I succeed, because one more failure is not what our race needs.
Why be a gentlemen, because anything else is unacceptable.
Why work, because I have to live.
Why continue to live, because I have to take advantage of the gift that god gave.
Why stand up, because I'm tired of sitting down.
Why walk away, because I can fight another day.
Why be strong, because the plight of the black man is on my shoulders.
Why accept the challenge, because I like to defy the odds.

Why am I here, why are you there.
Why are you reading this, because I wrote it.

The world ask questions every day that we all willingly answer. Tell me, who researches the answers to the queries of your soul?

A Test Of kindness

Hello all, I'm just starting out my morning but thought that I would share an experience I just had...

I was walking down the block tramping through all the 1 inch of snow that fell upon Brooklyn over the last day and a half, heading towards my b44 bus stop. Music whaling in my ear, Neyo is helping me to keep pace this morning, and all of a sudden my volume drops, and I hear a man's voice, 'Excuse Me Sir'.

The voice was that of an older gentleman standing beside me. He was partly hunched over, but overall a good specimen for his age. He asked me to help him across the street, so ofcourse me being the man my grandmother raised, I naturally obliged. While we walked across the street, and subsequently down the next block, he informed me that he could not see very well and that he had just very recently been diagnosed with cataracts. He smiled as he said it as if to say, he was vision impaired and not vision deprived. But in either case, I doubt that he would let it stop him.

As we walked and talked he smiled and laughed, and well, so did I. When we parted ways and I bid farewell to my friend I began to feel a sense of joy. What turned down my music, beats me. What made me turn around, I have no clue. What made this gentlemen pick me to be his guide, your guess is as good as mines. But I do know one thing, it's bigger than my body.

Thanks for reading, I would write more but I affraid i'll miss my stop getting all into my blog. God bless, and have a great day...
Sent from my Nokia phone

What's Happenning...

They say 'Men don't CRY', but I know it's ok for 'Real Men' to shed a tear. Better out than in. I don't mind sharing my emotions, it just depends whose there.

Well lately my worlds been a roller coaster, crazy is not the word. To define it takes a phrase you've never heard, something totally absurd, dream it up, call it what you like. Damn I'm hurt, think I'll shed that tear now. Nah, ball that river now.

My heart hurts, how did I get here. My spirits worn, souls torn, clothes are fresh, damn... Ain't it crazy how people look good in death. I don't mind if you're a pest, ask what's going on. The answer idk, nah wait just kidding. Sike, damn I wish I knew.

What happened to me, what happened to us. One day I felt a rush, now I look in the mirror and it all just wants gush. Crash into me, let's collide. Hail a cab, I could use a ride. Damn, see, there I go, running away again.

Today was a good day. Nothing happened but nothing went wrong. I coasted through, Made it through. So I say again, today was a good day. Life ain't a High School musical. Ain't no singing like Sharpay.

Where are my thought's going, I have no clue. I just wanna say FUCK the world, cause it's just full of shit. But that'll put down all the good thing's, all the beauty in it.

I wonder what she's doing. On second thought, no I don't. Let's reconsider, yes I do. It's so hard to be done with you. How can I be, I love you. And you and I both know...

Someone save me, how do I breathe, how can I be drowning when my body is afloat. Doggy paddle through the waves, I'm so rugged, I need a shave. Bad behave, starting to have champagne nightmares.

Monster, how should I feel. I been to the moon and back. Dodging cars, against all odds, Dublin to Dublin. I'm hungry, Amster-damn... Need a pound UK, crazy night, RU OK. It's late, wanna stay.

I've learned life isn't like a box of chocolates, and when you plan ahead, you know exactly what you'll get. Don't believe me try it out, tired of reading walk it out.

This Blog made me feel better, I'm no longer under the weather. There's still a few reasons I'd cry. I'm not Ginuwine, so it ain't mom and dad. Tre passe, so corny, what a fad. Ni Hao, ja te ame.

Good night all, I'm hitting the sack, long day manana.

Blog you lata.

And so it Begins...

Ok, so my work day has officially begun. In the office @ 9:45, coat is not even fully off before 'BAM' , the phone rings lol. The work has now commenced, on with the show.

I had a lovely breakfast though, a SNICKERS bar. Mmmm, hungry? Why wait, grab a SNICKERS. Welp, bar done, I'm still famished. Guess I'll be hitting the store soon.

I guess it's back to work now, this place is getting busy.

Blog you later...

O yeah, can you tell by the pic that I'm just not feeling it today, you know, the work flow...

What a non-day

Today was a rather laid back and mundane day. I woke up early, to take some calls and send a few emails only subsequently fall right back to sleep. I was knocked out till 1:30 in the afternoon when it hit me, the lovely smell of cooking going on in the kitchen. Bacon, sausage, some good 'ol liver puddin' and grits, mm mmm mm. Suffice it to say, I tore it up, threw it down quick.

My afternoon flew by quick as h e double hockey sticks. Grabbed a package from Leroy, a quick trip to the store and chat with Brice and lo and behold its 4 o'clock. Got dayum where does it go. A spin on face book, a Myspace update and bammm, 7 o'clock.

At about 7:15 I put my dinner on. Yes, a brother can cook, and yes it's edible. Lol, don't hate. Steak with potato's and carrots, yes I enjoyed it.

The rest of the day was utterly boring. I cleaned up some, sorted my laundry that I never washed, laughed as I sat through a prank phone call and even played along. I watched and un ending stream of 'B movie s' that absolutely did not entertain and ultimately spent the latter part of my day tapping away on my cell phone. That good 'ol e71 never dissapoints.

So, here I am lying in bed typing this, what is turning out to be utterly boring blog and i'm second guessing even publishing it, buuuuuuut, ima do it anyway.

Any way's I'm rather bored so I guess I'm gonna hit the hay...

Lata day's folk...

The Twins Had A Party...

Ok, so today is Saturday the 31st of January, and my little cousins Mya and Marlon had a birthday party. They turned 3 officially on the 21st but we had the celebration today...

Ok so the party was ok, the down side to it all, which you pretty much cannot complain about do to the occasion were the amount of children there. It was like the million kid march. Boys, girls, snotty noses, loud mouth's, hyper-activeness, jeez Louise it was nutter's. The full ice cream bar accompanied by 6 types of cookies, cakes and tons of candy to boot did not help the situation either. Lol I'm gonna kill my aunt.

The games were nice: skeet ball, ring toss, musical chairs, red light green light, baseball catch and name that tune, to name a few. Kids had a blast so of-course I loved it.

Can I just say that for kids they can really eat. Hot dogs, fried chicken, tossed salad, mac and cheese, potato salad all finished, gone, done, finito, hasta la vista foodie... Lol, buuuuuuttt, enter the Broker Chef to save the day, or stomachs. White rice and curry goat for all. Mmm mmm.

Time to open gifts and boy did the twins clean up. Clothes, toys, money, that's what I'm talking about lol.

The day was a success, auntie ''E'' you did your thing. I had fun and so did the Twins.

I took a few pics so I'll try to load them and update this blog when I get to my laptop. I'm blogging mobile right now so lol, limited access.

Any way's, I'm outie... Blog to you later...

The First Family...

This is a pic taken of the "First Family" @ President Obama's inauguration. January 20th, 2009...

1st blog

Hello world, welcome to my newly created, literally it's 5 mins old, Blog. I figured i'd start one to help me pass the time, rant, vent, create, share, indulge, and maybe get out of a little 'real wrk' at the job...

It's currently about 11:05 and I am writing this on my cell phone. My lovely and most incredible nokia e71. I so love this thing. Lol. I just may write a blog about it.

Anyway guys and gals, i'll write more tomorrow. So come one come all, it's the number 1 destination for the undestinated. RichmanS world by RdotGreenIII